Thriving Under Fire Blog

Valentine's Day 2013

Posted by John Faisandier on Mar 24, 2014 2:11:18 PM

Whatever you may think about Valentine’s Day there is a degree of excitement around. I heard people renewing their vows to their partners on the radio this morning. People give red roses, chocolates, special meals and many other signs of their love today.
Anything that get’s people to relate better to each other is good in my book. Building positive relationships needs to be worked at. Just as with a loving relationship you need to say and do things to let the other person know they are loved, respected and valued.

The more positive you are with others the stronger the links will be between you and the more likely the other person is to do what you want. Education research done over a period of 40 years by Dr Ethna Reid, from Salt Lake City in Utah, showed that the more praise and recognition a child got in school the more likely they were to learn.

By showing someone special attention on Valentines’ Day you are praising them for their ‘loveableness’. You are attending to the positive things about them and ignoring their faults and failing, at least for today. This will make your relationship stronger.

Apply this principle to good customer service.

When you get customers or colleagues who are upset and distressed it is tempting to reject them because in that moment they are not very ‘loveable’.  They are difficult customers or difficult colleagues who you might otherwise avoid. They are certainly not open to you and your ideas. They would be aware that when they are like this people reject them.

When you acknowledge their emotions without judgement you are accepting them. You might even acknowledge that you can see it is understandable that they are feeling the way they are. This would be the customer service equivalent of a sweet Valentine’s gift.

Simply accept them without judgement and find a way to affirm them.

Happy Valentine’s Day.

First posted by John Faisandier on 14th February, 2013

Topics: customer service, Acknowledge Feelings, Emotion, Conversations, Difficult People, Emotions, Life Positions, Perspective, Relationships

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